By Luis Rosario, director of communications/event relations for MorningCoach.com.

Loneliness comes in many forms. Sometimes we are lonely in a relationship, at work, from the effects of substance abuse, even in our daily activities. These things that we associate ourselves with may lead to a sense of dependency and attachment that is often hard to break. As social creatures we put ourselves in boxes based on characteristics that define who we are, creating labels with our self-identity.

Our self-identity is a guideline for how we think and behave. What happens when external forces affect this identity? What happens when a partner leaves, when we receive bad treatment at work, or are ousted by a group? How is your self-identity affected by these life changes?

We tend to stick to our herd, what is familiar to us; anything outside of this is an unknown canvas that has yet to be painted by our own perception. When what is comfortable and familiar is lost, there’s an empty feeling, a void left vacant by what was once there, causing feelings of loneliness to come into play and affect our self-identity.

Some of the greatest pioneers in history have experienced some form of physical, mental, spiritual, emotional or ideological loneliness. In certain situations their unique and original way of thinking led them to become ousted by society. Eventually their ability to endure and embrace this sense of loneliness led them to life-changing breakthroughs. If you look at many historical figures they all share this common thread of achievement in spite of being lonely.

When you are lonely, embrace it. I am not suggesting you become an anti-social loner. What I am suggesting is that you recognize and understand loneliness when you come across it in your life. When you understand and embrace your feelings of loneliness, you will learn to let go. When you let go, you begin to gain control.